An excess of stuff

I am not working today. I'm not sick, I simply canceled my sub jobs for the day and stayed home. It was lovely, and I was actually very productive. One thing I did today was go through boxes in the basement that I packed up 3 1/2 years ago when I went to Argentina. It really is amazing to me how much stuff I have down there. I managed to throw away quite a bit of stuff and consolidate some of what was left and eliminated two or three boxes, but there is still quite a bit there. The thing is, there is nothing really to do with most of it, and I can't quite bring myself to throw it away. What do you do, for example, with a box of grad school textbooks (that for the most part I didn't even read when I was in the class). They're 4-5 years old- too old to sell I would imagine. But to just throw out a box of mint condition books? I feel bad even donating them- who would want to read them?? I also have a couple of binders that are in great condition, amongst other things. I still have loads of teaching stuff- bins and stacking trays and classroom games and math manipulatives that I don't see myself flying to distant lands, but am not quite sure what to do with. I've also got a fair amount of household stuff- small kitchen appliances or placemats or utensils. And don't even start on the old photo albums or boxes of neatly organized pictures. Or the framed pictures. I found at least a dozen from various stages of life.

There are the practical questions- what am I going to do with all this stuff (other than leave it in the basement... for now) but it also makes me realize that I seriously do not need or want any more stuff! I hate throwing things away, not so much because I am going to miss it, but because I hate all that stuff going to the landfills. But beyond clothes, I'm not really sure I can donate too much of it. Which brings me back to- how can I stop acquiring stuff? Obviously, part of that answer is easy: stop buying it! Substitute teaching has helped cure me of a lot of my shopping habits. But there is more to it than that. I want a simpler lifestyle- more time, attention, and money on the things that matter (people), and less on the things that don't (stuff). Without just pitching a great deal of things (yes, Clare, even the sentimental ones) I'm not sure how to really pare down.

Maybe in another few weeks I'll have the motivation to go through the basement stuff again and purge some more, find somewhere that will accept non-clothing donations. I've done a few stages of it over the past few months and slowly but surely, the pile is shrinking. And if I can just keep from adding to it...

Predictions

Yesterday my extended family opened and read 10 year predictions we had made in early 2000 (we were a year late in getting to them). Writing long-range predictions can be fun, but it's a bit dangerous too. This was the second time (at least to my knowledge) that the family has done something like this, and the second time that one of the participants passed away during that decade. We all missed Gramma as we heard her predictions read, but I at least found it more comforting than devastating. Her voice was clear in what she had written- a reminder of her hopes, dreams, and vision for her family.

Some of the things we said were funny- my cousin, 15 at the time- thought that we'd be able to buy whatever we wanted online and then simply pull it out of the computer:) I predicted that just about every older cousin would leave SE Michigan, except for myself! Some predictions were quite accurate- personal phone numbers, for example, while others were way off- the DOW at 60,000?

The whole process got me thinking- the what will happen of the next 10 years is not nearly as important as who we will become. I don't know where I will be in 10 years, or what I will be doing, or what the state of the country or the world will be. But I do hope, that no matter what the circumstances, we are each more like Jesus than we are today. As Peter reminds us in 1 Peter, we are all strangers and exiles in this land, we live for an existence and a glory that cannot be comprehended on this present earth.

Next month, for Chinese New Year, we'll gather and write new 10 year predictions. I don't know what is going to happen externally in my life, but I pray that whatever it is, it makes and molds me into the woman of God that he wants me to be, that in 10 years I am more patient, more kind, more loving, more gentle, more faithful, more worshipful than I am today.

Merry Christmas

Linus Van Pelt: "And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, 'Fear not: for behold, I bring unto you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

Waiting

Zechariah and Elizabeth waited to get pregnant, then they waited for the birth, then they waited for John to grow up to fulfill the calling God had on his life. Mary and Joseph waited for Jesus' birth. Simeon waited so many years to see the Messiah, to see the promise fulfilled. All of Isreal waited for the coming of the Messiah. Mary and Joseph waited for Jesus to grow up, treasuring and pondering in their hearts the words spoken about him, they waited as he learned the family trade and lived 30 years before they could even begin to understand the mysteries of his birth.

Waiting. We're all waiting on something, trusting God's timing that just as he did with the birth and life and death of his Son, he will bring all things at their proper time. I have to say, I'm not the biggest fan of waiting, of putting the Chrismtas holiday (and school break) right smack in the middle of international schools job hunting season. The stockings are hung by the chimney with care, just as the applications have all been sent out with a prayer. Waiting.

One of my favorite songs of all time is 'O Come O Come Emmanuel'. One of my favorite lines is "Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Isreal" reminding me that we are to rejoice in the waiting, rejoice in knowing that Emmanuel will come again, rejoice knowing that our Savior lives and our God is faithful. Rejoice not inspite of the waiting, but because of the waiting. Answers will come at the proper time, and Christ will come again, just as it was promised.

TCK's

TCK stands for Third Culture Kid, people who spend a significant number of their developmental years living outside their parents' passport country. There are a few of them in my classes right now and today I had the opportunity to talk to one of them. He told me about his time in China and his school there and how hard it was to come back "home". As he talked, my heart went out to this student. Two years later, he still very clearly misses China and doesn't feel at home here. He blossomed and lit up as we talked. I loved it just as much as he did, connected with someone who knew my experiences and understood what I was talking about.

I was also reading Matthew this morning and thinking about how Jesus himself was a TCK. Joseph took him and Mary to Egypt where they had to adapt to a new culture, language, and life. And they too returned, to Galilee, and had to resettle at home. A great reflection for this advent season, that we await the coming of the King, a Lord who understands our struggles, even those as global citizens.

Letting Go

Some days, I just really miss Argentina and everyone there. I woke up that way today, missing my kiddos especially. So how excited was I when one of them chatted with my on facebook? Say what you will about facebook- it gave him an easy way to get in touch with me and say hello. And today especially, I appreciated it.

It's job hunting season and the sad news is that it does not appear that BAICA has any job openings for next year, much less one that would fit for me. Murphy's Law I guess- it's probably the only year in BAICA history that they're not hiring. And though I am excited about some of the other prospective jobs out there, I do feel like I am losing Argentina all over again as I lose the hope of returning. Letting go is hard, and I am finding that in comes in waves and stages.

It's at that point that I have to stop and trust that God does indeed have a plan for my life, that it's not as aimless and wandering as it sometimes feels, that if this door is closed it's because he has another one to open. Trust is a daily exercise- a daily choosing to lay down my life to the King of kings.

Science Teacher!

Yesterday I started my temp job as a 7th grade science teacher. I'll be subbing for this teacher at least until Christmas break, and most likely a week or two afterward as well. Luckily, she is extremely organized and the other 7th grade science teacher is very friendly and helpful, so it's not to overwhelming. I do find it a bit ironic though, because science is really not my specialty. Today we did a lab, which had its rough moments but went well. Only 4 test tubes were broken and one substance spilled all over- luckily it was just salt:) The first two days have been fun, but have also brought out the stark contrasts between the large public school and the small international Christian school.

• The distance between teachers and students seems weird to me here. I am so accustomed to interacting with the students on a deeper level, not only because of class size (though that definitely plays a part) but also because of the nature of the school and teacher-student relationships.
  
• My instinct to pray with the kids or talk about prayer with them is still there, and I find it pops into me head fairly often. The teacher I am subbing for is out for hip surgery, and I keep wanting to pray for her in class or with other teachers or something like that. A few weeks ago a second grader told me in class that his grandpa was in the hospital. I couldn't think how to respond other than saying we could pray for him!
  
• Then there's the difference between teaching 5 classes once each verses one class 5 times a day (which is what I do now). Mostly, it's just a difference in the size of the school. As a sub, the set up is nice because I only have to get my brain around one lesson per day, but I will admit, I'm pretty sick of it by the end of the day, or by the time I've read the same answers 120+ times.
  

I'm very thankful to have this job and bit of consistency in my life. The staff and teachers at the school are wonderful and have made me feel very welcome- something you don't always find in the public schools.