One aspect of life at an international school, Christian or otherwise, is the constant question/obsession of the future- how long you will stay, what you will do next, what you want to do/dream to do/feel called to do with "the rest of your life" (The rest of my life? I can't even decide what I want for breakfast). Not being a big picture person, I am not a fan of this aspect of life here, and I think even for those who are more big picture oriented it can be quite distracting. Yes, the future is important to think about, and certainly having goals and dreams is not a bad thing. But when we become so concerned with tomorrow that we miss today, it can be a problem.
And I don't want to miss out on today. Because today my students are using data to investigate 'the mysterious disappearance of a Mr. Gerald Orkney' or today I am holding a precious four month old who is growing like a weed or today I am talking with a friend who will live thousands of miles away in just a few months time or today I am watching a child smile and play rugby even while their tomorrows remain uncertain. We only get to hold on to today once.
When Jesus called his disciples to follow him, he didn't lay out a master plan and he didn't tell them where they'd be in 10 years- if he had, would they have followed? Jesus didn't ask them to pray a 'sinner's prayer' before coming along and they didn't ask him if they could chat it over with their families before they committed. Jesus asked them to follow him, and they did. They didn't have to clean their lives up first, and then follow. They followed, and then Jesus cleaned their lives up.
Today Jesus asks me to follow him. Today he asks you the same thing. Some of us, he leads to Thailand. Others he leads within the context in which they already live. Everyday Jesus asks us to follow, and everyday we have a choice. Here and now. For me, that following has brought me to Thailand, where I live until he leads me elsewhere. But it is so much more than that. Following Jesus takes all our heart, all our soul, all our mind. Yesterday for me, following him meant an awesome day supporting a rugby tournament- watching our Nak Suu kids get a chance to play, helping with selling beer coupons (for the mens teams, haha, not the Nak Suu kids), and whatever else I could do that was helpful. Today following him means rest for my heart, for my spirit, for my body, serving with the usher team at church, and dinner with a friend. Tomorrow, it will likely mean teaching with patience, joy, and grace. 15 years from now? Who knows what that following will look like. But I do know one thing.
I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back, no turning back.
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