Precious Friends, Precious Weekend

Throwing rocks in the lake is so exciting!

I spent the long weekend Up North with friends who have been dear friends since birth, the kind of life-long friends everyone should have.  Our trips to their relatives' cottage on Lake Michigan have provided welcome consistency in my life over the last 8 years.  Our itinerary has changed over the years, from long runs and beach walks, laying out and short excursions, to short walks into town to run in the grass, quick trips to the local art gallery during nap time, and tossing rocks along the shore, but the essence of our time there remains the same.  We read books (even if they tend to have more pictures these days), enjoy the lake and woods, relax, visit Leg's Inn, and fall asleep watching movies.  It was a precious weekend for me and wonderful quality time with my friends and their families.  These girls are like sisters to me, their little ones like my own nieces and nephews.  I have loved being here this year, watching the boys first steps, hearing their first words, seeing the older one read her first words.  I miss them when I am gone, but always treasure the visits and times we have. 

The adults buy themselves a few minutes of peace...

She was the only one brave enough to actually touch the water

Story time with Dad!

Questions

Kids who grow up overseas often don't like the whole "where are you from?" kinds of questions because there aren't easy answers. They pick and choose when to give some sort of US location they have an affiliation with and when to give the answer that will bring the reactions and questions. I have found it to be similar as an adult moving overseas, except that the questions I cringe at are different. The what do you do or where do you work is the worst. Sometimes you can get away with "I teach" or even just by saying you're subbing this year. Sometimes I just don't want to go into the where and why of my current job because it just isn't quick, people don't expect it, and they either get an insufficient answer or one they just don't know what to do with. As a sub, I'm often asked at work if I have any job prospects. No easy way to answer that one without an explanation. Then there are the situations where I need things done a certain way or in a specific time frame because I'm leaving, and there just isn't an easy way to get it done without launching into the story. There are, of course, times when I don't mind going into the whole bit, but it can get tiresome, and some people really don't know how to react. But I have also noticed that part of what makes it more draining is my pride. I don't want people to know I live at my mom's or that I sub without them knowing the why. Too often I find myself giving the explanation just to save face, which maybe makes me just a little bit Thai. But I have also discovered the best defense to questions is a good offense. If someone is too busy telling me about their job or life they don't usually notice to ask me. That technique might not work so well with the lady on the phone from the grad school who wants to put me on their mailing list, though she should be able to handle a simple no. In a few months the job question will get easier, or at least hopefully easier to just say I teach, but the "Where do you live?" does get a whole lot harder on visits...

Summer Job!

God has been so faithful in providing for me this year (and always).  Ever since roughly Thanksgiving I've had extremely steady work, and most of it has been at my favorite school.  My subbing schedule is nearly full already for the rest of the school year, though I am taking the last week of school off in order to go Up North to Long Lake with my family.  I've been so blessed to be teaching in a great building, where I hardly feel like a sub anymore.  And last week the Principal asked me if I would be willing to teach their 3 week Summer Academy.  It starts immediately after school ends and goes until July 8th, leaving me 10 days until I leave.  The program will run from 8:30-11:30 in the morning and I can do my (paid) prep and planning at school, at home, by the pool, etc.  Because this program is similar to a summer school program, the pay is comparable to teacher pay so I will actually earn more per day just working in the mornings than I do now subbing all day.  Nearly 50% more.  The job also has the advantage of getting me up and out of bed and being productive, while still giving me every afternoon off. It won't be easy an easy job- it's a tough group of kids- but I'll only have 10 kids at a time and should be able to do some fun/interesting things with them.  The job and extra money will be such a blessing in my first weeks and months in Thailand, helping with so many up front costs to moving into a new apartment, paying baggage fees with the airlines, etc.  And I love how God provided this completely out of the blue- it literally walked into my classroom and was mine for the taking (the teachers at the school had first dibs I guess, but big surprise, no one wanted it, so they asked me).  Jehovah Jireh! 

Torn

Today is a day when I feel inexplicably torn between worlds. It is my friend's birthday, and as she celebrates in Buenos Aires, I wish I could be there. I was able to skype with her for a few minutes and sent a small package of goodies, but it's not the same. I miss her. I miss being there. And at the same time, I am getting so excited for Thailand. All the new teachers at ICS have to send in a short bio and photo, which they put up on the intranet. And as those come in and I'm able to start to learn a little bit about my fellow new teachers, it reminds me of all of the wonderful friends I made in Argentina and how God is preparing friendships for me in Thailand, even now. I am excited to meet them, and the teachers that are already there- excited to just be in Thailand and start serving. And yet, I still have a little over 2 months to wait. And at the same time, I am enjoying spring in Michigan. I'm watching Tigers games with my family, running outside, having dinner with friends- last weekend I was actually able to attend a friend's wedding, a rare thing for me these past few years. And while all these times don't entice me to stay, they do remind me of what I am giving up when I go.

And yet even in the midst of all of this, I read Psalm 23 and I know I have a Good Shepherd. I am being led to green pastures; I am being watched after and cared for. I am deeply loved. The emotions of transition are a bit crazy, but they never interfere with the call God has on my heart. I had the best conversation last weekend with someone at the wedding- she was a youth group volunteer back when I was in high school- and it just fired me up even more for the work ahead in Thailand. She is heavily involved in short term medical missions and her passion and love for God and for people shines through her all the time. It's infectious. Talking with her was such an encouragement to me at a juncture when it would be easy to be discouraged, easy to let the transition emotions dampen my excitement for what God has in front of me.

So even when I wish I could split myself into three and be everywhere I want to be all at once, I trust that I can confidently follow the One who leads me down paths of righteousness, not for my benefit, but for the sake of his Name.

Thoughts on Mothers

In the past month or so I've had the opportunity to be a 'substitute mom' for a few days to some of my cousins when their parents were out of town and I stayed with them. I've also been able to see my own mom in action when I, at 30 years old, needed her. Needless to say, the experiences have given me a whole new appreciation for moms and what Motherhood is all about and I figured this weekend of Mother's Day was a good time to comment on it. Here are a few of my observations:

• Being responsible for someone else changes your perspective on everything. Your thinking and planning no longer centers on yourself. It's a subtle but significant shift. It's not about you any more.
  
• Vegetables matter. I'll be honest, when I make dinner for myself I don't make a lot of veggies. I do love veggies, but let's be honest, they're a bit of a pain to prepare. But when thinking about dinner and preparing dinner for my cousins it suddenly became not so much of a pain in the butt because, well, veggies and being healthy matter. I think we had some sort of vegetable at just about every dinner growing up. Must have been real annoying, but she did it because it was good for us.
  
• Moms have to get out of bed and off the couch. This may sound simple, but for part of the time I was with some of my cousins I had a nasty cold. Left to my own devices I would have spent several of those days in bed or on the couch, certainly not up and about and showered. But when other people are relying on you, getting up is not really an option.
• Routines matter and details matter. I've noticed this with young kids when I substitute teach ("Mrs. So-and-so always stands on the other side of the calendar") but it matters just as much at home. One day I forgot the napkins (2- one for a placemat and one to use) in my cousin's lunch, and was asked very politely by a 6 year old if I could make sure to remember them tomorrow:) Moms establish those routines and follow through with them day in and day out.
  
• Mothering never ends. When you are 30 years old and you can't sleep in the middle of the night because you can't lay down because of your sinuses and you're miserable and you don't know what to do about it- you call Mom. And she shows up the next day with sinus rinse and drugs and TLC. Because that's what mom's do. And when you're still sick and you have friends come visit she helps you be the hostess because it's taking all your energy just to get off the couch.

My mom has been doing all this and much much more for 32 years. She watched soccer games and baseball games when I'm sure she'd rather have not. She spent weekends at skating competitions, was woken up in the middle of the night too many times to count, and even now that her children are older, she is still often their first phone call. She's still Dr. Mom. She's the dog-sitter and dinner cooker and holiday tradition upholder. In particular, this past year of my life would not have been possible without her. I live in her house and eat her food and drive her car and leave bits of food in the sink (somehow I can never rinse it out quite well enough) and yet she never complains (ok, maybe just about the sink) and I think, maybe, is even glad that I am here. And that is quite a Mom.

Happy Mother's Day!

Flights, Camera, Action!

Well, though not quite 100% finalized, I have finally seen the basic itinerary for my trip to Bangkok. As predicted, it appears I'll be leaving on July 18th and arriving there on the 19th. I'll be going from Detroit to Chicago (45 min), then to Seoul (14 hours), and then to Bangkok (nearly 6 hours). Total travel time should be about 24 hours. Luckily, I'll land at 10pm, so by the time I get to my apartment I'll have been traveling for a good 30 hours or so, it will be late, I will be ready for bed, and it will actually be night time! I still sort of doubt how much I'll sleep that night, but it does sound better to me than arriving in the morning and trying to stay up all day when all I want to do is sleep or throw up from being so tired.

Just seeing a flight schedule makes the whole thing seem so much closer, so much more real. I love it.

In the meantime I am soaking up all the time with family and friends that I can. I've decided not to sub at all the last week of school, in part so that I can spend that week at Long Lake with my family, but also in part because I am SICK OF SUBBING! This maternity leave job ends on Monday and while the consistency has been nice, her students are pretty nuts, so I'm quite happy she's coming back.

PS- It's May. Why isn't it warm yet???? I thought I would be done complaining about the Michigan cold by this point in the year...