Homesickness

Homesickness is a funny beast that comes and goes as it pleases- often coming during the most stressful weeks at work and going whenever a polar vortex hits Michigan.  The past week has been incredibly stressful work wise, and like everyone when things get stressful, it makes me want to escape. Except I don't want to escape to a tropical beach. I want to escape to my sister's large plush L shaped couch in Grand Rapids, with her across from me, a blanket on my lap, and a cup of tea in my hand. No, make that a glass of Malbec.  

I always assumed that homesickness would get better over time, but I was dead wrong. Every year it comes more often, stays longer, and hits deeper. Every year the things that bother you about a job or a host country or a situation get a little harder to swallow. I know that this week and these moments will pass, that things will get better and the crabbiness will subside, that I will remember that 14 degrees Fahrenheit is actually really cold and stop craving Michigan so badly, but until then it just hurts. 

Homesickness is an illness for which there is no cure. No bowl of ice cream or glass of wine or Skype chat will ever allow my heart to be in all the places it wants to be at once. No airplane can actually take my heart home. So I turn the AC a few degrees lower, pull the blanket up under my chin, and go to bed early. Because some days are just like that. Even in "Australia". 

It All Went According to Plan, Until We Ate the Duck

For months, I planned these few weeks with my brother here, and then my mom too, then just my mom.  We booked flights and hotels and cooking classes, plotted itineraries and scheduled our days.  And then in mid December he showed up, and the wheels started rolling, everything falling into place.  I'd spent so long planning it that as the days passed it all felt oddly surreal. 

Then we came home from Koh Chang at 6pm, starving and ready for dinner.  We thought some Korean barbeque might be nice, but chose a nice Chinese restaurant at the last minute for Matt's last dinner in Bangkok before flying home the next night.  We ordered, among other things, their famous roast duck. And that's where the trouble started. The food seemed oddly lukewarm and the duck especially was not hot. 

By the time I woke up at 6am the next day, I was the only one who had slept and my brother had already started puking.  Mom wasn't far behind. For the next 5-6 hours I ran between them as they got worse and then laid down at the foot of my bed when I could, nauseated myself.  By late morning I was really worried and starting contacting friends to help and had a colleague's wife (who is a nurse) stop by.  As the dehydration got worse we got my doctor to come to the house to see them as they couldn't really go anywhere.  She was a lifesaver.  Without that we may have had to make an ER run.  

I called Lufthansa to find out the options for changing Matt's flight and getting a medical certificate, called the airline Mom and I were going to fly to Chiang Mai the next day and cancelled the cooking class we had scheduled for that day. 

By evening my nausea got much worse and I started getting sick.  I had been praying all day that I would just stay healthy enough to take care of them and that I would be able to summon the strength to do so.  I'll be honest. I had never cleaned up after sick people before, other than myself.  Normally, if I had felt how I did, I would not have gotten out of bed.  But somehow, when other people are counting on you, we find that place of super-strength, similar I am sure to the strength hidden inside of moms who take care of sick kids or keep the house going even when they are sick.  Food poisoning taught me a lot about service. 

Luckily by the time I was on the tile floor my mom was well enough to check on Matt from time to time and I was able to pop up in the better moments and help them.  By night I was feeling okay and laid down on the couch to keep watch through the night.  I crawled into bed at about 1:30 once Matt's fever had broken, I'd gotten some fluids in him, and everyone was sleeping as comfortably as possible. 

Needless to say, Matt didn't make it home that night nor did we make it to Chiang Mai the next day.  We didn't make it to Chiang Mai as it was going to be a short trip and by the time we could go it was only one night, plus, in order to change it I would have had to be on the phone with the airline in my worst moments to reschedule.  But we've had some relaxing days here and then were able to head out to the ginormous Chatachuk market on Saturday, the Jim Thompson House, and the yesterday the Grand Palace.

The soonest Lufthansa could get Matt on a flight was the 9th, so he booked another flight home the night of the 4th.  Except shortly after he left for the airport Mom looked at his itinerary and noticed a problem with the date: January 19th.  So I ran off behind him to the airport, though by the time I got there and had him paged he had already exchanged more money and was working on getting himself to my apartment in a taxi (quite a feat- sometimes it's hard for me to get the drivers to go the right place even when I know exactly where to go and speak a bit of the language).  Eventually my mom called me on the spare cell phone to tell me he was back and I returned home.  So he's back to the flight on the 9th.  We're make the best of the fact that he's stuck here with me awhile longer. 

So it has not gone according to plan, these last 5 days, but God has sustained me in the moments of worry.  When I've needed to serve, he's given me strength.  When I've needed to sleep, I've slept.  But I needed to hold my cookies, I've held them.  And in the midst of it all we've had some laughs and been able to poke a bit of fun at ourselves. And we have quite a mind to walk back into that Chinese restaurant and give them the bill for what it cost us to eat at their restaurant! 

This is Thailand

In Argentina, when stuff happened that was crazy or frustrating or "just how things are" in Argentina, we always just said well, "Bienvenidos a Argentina", which means welcome to Argentina.  Here, when that stuff happens we say well, "This is Thailand".  And yes, there have been several moments like that lately. But there have also been moments that are just as much Thailand to me, and way more positive.

• It takes 8 days and bazillions of phone calls to get the internet working in the apartment. This is Thailand. 
• When you call the internet company call center instead of getting an operator on the operator line you get a chance to leave your name and number for them to call you back. Maybe. This is Thailand. 
• You come down with nasty food poisoning and you're not sure what it was that you ate that caused it- there are several good candidates.  This is Thailand. 
• Your apartment doesn't have a stove, so you get a counter-top hot plate.  After a week of using it only for the tea kettle, you go to heat up some leftover rice soup and it doesn't work.  Try the tea kettle. Works. Put the saucepan back on. Turns itself off.  Kettle. Heats up. Saucepan. Turns off.  Over and over and over.  Turns out that the saucepan doesn't have a stainless bottom, so it won't work on the hot plate. Have to replace one or the other (going to replace the hotplate I think, since someone just gave it to me and I specially chose this nice saucepan). This is Thailand. 
• Laying at home on the couch recovering from said food poisoning without any internet so your only communication with the outside world is the cell phone. Which promptly runs out of minutes due to use and your friend has to buy and deliver phone cards for you. This is Thailand.  
• Your friends spend their time and energy battling the internet problem with you, translating for the service technician, sitting on hold with the Thai call center line, giving them their number to call back, and fiddling with the modem for you.  This is my Thailand. 
• Friends who deliver Gatorade, carbon tablets, rice soup, phone cards, and later bread and bananas to your home on the couch when you are sick.  This is my Thailand.
• Colleagues who cover for your classes and follow the sketched out plans you wrote for yourself when you couldn't send in sub plans.  This is my Thailand.
• A friend who lets you use their US phone card since you can't skype your mother to tell her you're sick, not that she can do anything but simply because when one is sick you must tell mom.  This is my Thailand. 

Yes, this is Thailand, and I'm quite happy to be here and to be feeling much better and be back online at home.

Life abroad: the glamorous side

It's been a really glamorous few days overseas: no internet at home still and I've been home with food poisoning.  Back to work today, don't know how many more times I'll have to harass the internet company to get that set up, so may still be a while before I get back to blogging. Hoping for the best, especially in terms of the breakfast I ate today...

A Method to the Madness

Some people in the world are really "good" at being sick- they don't complain and they just power through as if nothing were wrong.  But let's be honest- I am  not one of those people.  When I am sick, I usually put my entire life on hold and lay on the couch (and often moan while I am at it) until I am better.  Other people, many times the power-through-and-never-complain-people, seem to look down on me for this (perhaps it is the overly dramatic moaning...).  Last week, perhaps against my better judgment, I decided to be one of those other people, and here I am, a week later, still feeling yucky.  Instead of admitting "I can't do this" on my sickest days, I went on the field trips- and I even did my best not to complain the entire time, though I certainly wasn't 100% successful.  Instead of canceling my fun skating outing on Saturday, I went, knowing it would be very tough to reschedule, and on Sunday, despite every fiber of my being wanting a nap, I stayed all afternoon after church for a bridal shower since I don't get to see my church friends very often (since everything happens downtown and in the evening when I am in bed). I loaded up on Tylenol, grabbed a few throat lozenges and powered through.  Even though I slept for 12 hours Friday night and 9 hours Saturday night, it just wasn't enough.  I'm exhausted, and still not quite over whatever this is, making me realize that perhaps my maddening resting might just be the best route after all, even if I often travel it alone.  

Perhaps next time I get sick I will be content to be my lazy self, my sit-on-the-couch-and-sip-tea self, my rest-rest-rest-and-put-life-on-hold self, and not feel bad about it.  And while I contemplate that, I am going to lay down and watch DVD's until bedtime or 8pm, whichever comes sooner.

A trip to the hospital

If there's one thing I have learned from living abroad it's that seeing the doctor is a very cultural thing and every country has it's own system.  The whole national health care thing was a bit strange in Scotland and it definitely took me some time in Buenos Aires to figure out how to navigate the system there.  One thing that was very different there was that people "went to the hospital" for all kinds of things.  Things that we in the US would see a GP for.  Eventually I figured out that the hospitals had a more broad version of urgent care, and that dropping by there was really the best way to be seen if you were sick.  Doctors visits were reserved for managing ongoing problems or for when you needed a medical certificate for something. 

So I wasn't completely surprised here in Thailand when people got sick and "went to the hospital".  I had been to the local hospital once during orientation for a quick medical check-up that was required for my work permit.  The hospital was really quite nice.  I went to the big international hospital downtown two weeks ago for an international fair they were hosting, and that place was 5 star.  Not only was the facility gorgeous, they had a beautiful and extensive food court, if you could even call it that, where we ate lunch.  Even with these pop-in visits, I still wasn't quite sure how this whole thing worked.  If you were sick, but not in any severe way, what department do you go to?  Will everyone speak English?  How do you fill prescriptions?  How much does it all cost? 

This week, I had my chance to learn a bit of that.  I got sick again this week, and since it was the second time in a matter of two weeks and this one came on more suddenly and severely, I decided I needed to see a doctor. I sent an email to a few close friends who are either Thai or have been here long enough to know how the system works to see if anyone could go with my after school to show me where to go, how it works, etc.  One of my Thai friends said it would be better if I went during the day because it would be faster, so within a matter of minutes she and I were on our way to the local hospital during our free period. 

I was so glad to have her there.  Not only was she able to translate (the doc spoke English but I don't know about all the check-in people and nurses along the way) but she also knew exactly where to go and what to do so I was able to just relax.  And it's not like in the States where you just sign your name on a clipboard where they know you and wait until they call you back.  There's a registration place where you check in, then you go to another area and wait until they call you up for weight and blood pressure and then you wait in an area that has a dozen or so little doctor's offices.  Once they call you (and I always knew it was going to be me when they looked at the name, looked real uncomfortable at how to say it, and then gave it their best shot), you go to one of these little rooms where there is a doctor and a nurse.  After he saw me we went and waited in another area where you pay, which is right next to the pharmacy where they give you all the things the doctor prescribed.  And whoa did he prescribe!  I was sent away with an antibiotic as well as OTC's for headache, cough, sinus congestion, and allergies.  My medicine cabinet is now well stocked.  Total cost for doc and nurse: $15. Total prescription cost: $30. 

So, I'm home, once again- three days rest ordered by the doctor. I am tired, but improving, and plan to basically stay home all weekend.  I'm going to eat dinner with a friend tomorrow and watch a movie, but that's about it.  Being sick is not fun, but I am very grateful for my friend's help in getting to the doctor and in the excellent medical care that is available to me in Bangkok.  I had heard good things about it before coming, and so far it has lived up to the expectation. Hopefully soon I'll be up and exploring again and blogging about something other than the Thai health system...

Community

Over the past 6 months, as people heard that I was moving to Thailand to teach at an international Christian school, they have over and over again expressed their astonishment that I could do that and told me of how brave I must be.  Rubbish, I tell them.  I think it's easier to move here than to a new place in the US.  Why?  Community.

I've lived in Thailand for less than 2 months, and already I have friendships that go well beyond surface things.  If I ever need anything, I have several people that I could call.  Take this past week.

On Sunday, I started feeling a little under the weather.  A friend met me half way between her apartment and mine to give me some Emergen-C (vitamins) and fresh from the oven pumpkin bread.  By Wednesday I was feeling much worse and went home Thursday after school knowing I would not make it in on Friday.  So Thursday evening, a friend dropped off hot soup, bread, and juice.  Two other friends stopped by with their entire DVD collections, so I could have some amusement while I rested at home today.  Early this morning, shortly after I woke up, a knock at my door produced a steaming cup of chai tea.  A few moments ago, yet another friend brought by a bowl of homemade pasta salad, the non-white and creamy kind that I like.  Tell me, where in the US would that happen 7 weeks after you move somewhere?

This is not meant as a slight to the US.  It would likely be the same for anyone moving within their own nation.  The difference here is the international community, and more specifically, the international Christian/mission community.  While there are struggles with moving to a new country and culture, there are also great advantages that God has blessed me with.  It is such a privilege to serve Him here.  I love that I can talk to my students about Jesus, that I can pray with my coworkers, that I now have friends across the globe who encourage me in my faith and bring unique cultural perspectives to our conversations about God.

24 hours of watching movies in my pajamas and sleeping is starting to do the trick and I am beginning to feel that I am on the mend.  Hopefully tomorrow I will feel well enough to venture out to the Thai Craft Fair and keep at least one social commitment this week.  But I know that even if it takes another couple of days, I won't be alone in a faraway land.  Too much community around here for that. 

Being Sick in Thailand

I've noticed several differences in how germs and illness are viewed here, and now that I am a bit sick myself I figured it was a good time to discuss them. 

My first clue that things are different is that our school employs two full time nurses for our student body of ~850.  This means that when you send a child "to the nurse/clinic" they actually go to a clinic and see a nurse, not the office and see a secretary.  In the US, I think our entire district had one nurse who only dealt with major health concerns. 

Second, now that school is in full swing and kids are sick, I get daily emails from the secondary school nurse which track flu and other illnesses and symptoms.  Each day I find out who has gone home sick and what they have.  The kids are required to check in with her upon their return, and I am then informed of that as well. 

Our classroom windows are now going to be kept open every Saturday to air out the rooms.  A handful of kids have been sick, 2-3 per day out of 400-450 or so.  Some with flu-like symptoms.   There a antibacterial gel dispensers spread throughout the school. Sometimes I look at them and wonder if anyone uses them or if they are just leftover from that whole swine flu mess a few years back.

The other thing that I have a little chuckle at is the masks that people wear when they are sick.  People wear them fairly regularly here to protect themselves against pollution- for example bus drivers or moto-taxi drivers or others in or near traffic.  But people also wear them quite commonly when they are sick.  While I applaud Thailand's recognition of germ transmission and their efforts to keep everyone healthy, don't expect me to start wearing a mask anytime soon.  I've been running a low fever since Sunday morning and I'm hot and stuffy enough without covering my nose and mouth and inhibiting my ability to breathe.  Looking ridiculous has nothing to do with it, of course, since no one would look twice if they saw me walking down the street in one.  I am sure there are those who would prefer that I wear a mask in an attempt to keep them from catching whatever fever/exhaustion/sore throat I have, but most of my sick students have worn one and look where it got me. My feverish friends didn't wear them, but you know, whatever. 

Meanwhile, I am going to drink some more OJ and retire early to my bed.  I feel somewhat confidant that if the nurse at school saw me she'd try to get me to stay home, but at this point in the year I'd have to be a whole lot worse off to hand over my still-not-quite-trained students to a sub.  The work I'd have to put into those sub plans would keep me up all night.